mikamayhem

I'm making a lot of life changing decisions lately, I just wish I could be smarter about it but I don't find them necessarily bad, I just find the outcome disappointing. I make mistakes a lot, but I'm learning. Due to multiple disappointments; I'm grown to be strong, And keep moving forward. No, I don't believe in myself as much as I make it seem; I am very insecure and sensitive. A lot of things can make me sad but only about 3 people could honestly make me cry. I am the single most confusing person you will ever meet. I'm not a book, don't try to read me, I'm not an item, money can't buy me, I'm not a whore, forget what you've heard, its all lies. I can be hyper at one minute and then I can be extremely mellow. Its weird. I'm not bipolar just a teenager. I've lost all hope in humanity. I become attached to things way too easily. I will never seize my creativity. People constantly let me down so I don't get excited for things of the such. I hate this town, I constantly try to get away. I daydream a lot and zone out. I come from a big world and I am very different from anyone you will ever know. I'm a negative person and I constantly complain but I can be totally positive and make you smile very easy if you'd let me. I contradict myself constantly and spew gibberish always; you'll learn to like it, or not, I have enough friends anyways. I have a sick sense of humor. I say really rude things without thinking, I really don't care what reaction it may cause. If you have a problem understanding sarcasm you'll probably hate me. I think about and question everything. I don't believe in fate. I believe you control everything in your life. I am very confused but things are slowly falling into place as we speak for me.. I can make you smile, I can make you cry. I can care, But I can blow you off. I can make you love me, Or I can make you hate me. I am very sensitive about a lot of subjects, especially about myself. I've changed a lot in the past year, many people have opened my eyes and made me look at something differently.