This day was a waste of my existance. Why can't I grow and be something. Why can't I accomplish something great. I just take everything for granted, lose every great thing I've ever had,make horrible descisions, and do nothing to change. Maybe I've changed, but I still feel lonely. Something's missing, but I can't find it. I had a chance, but everything went wrong so fast, and now I'm back to where I started. I'm shaking. Everything is so wrong with the youth today. I hold myself accountable as well. I could be the queen of all hypocrits, if possible. People say nice things, it has no effect. They all lie. The only one who understands me is my dog; and my friends; and I still feel like I have so many issues, why dump it on them. I know I'm wierd, creepy, odd, too nice...whatever you say to me. I'm just insecure. I live in my own fantasy world, because this world is not my home. I'm getting weaker, as we speak. I'm keeping my secrets to myself. I'm keeping my heart closer to me than ever before. I've let it out of it's cage to much and it hurts. People take advantage of the only thing I have,that means anything to me. I'm lonely, but I'm scared. I've never felt these feeling before. I've always thought people needed second chances,and I've always made the descision to make others happy before what I wanted. That's going to change.I am going to do what makes me happy,and not please the public,anymore! I'm waiting, around, it's coming, I can feel it. don't say word