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i'm jen i like to make music and i like jello a lot but i guess that's not important... i am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. occasionally, i tread water for three days in a row. will ferrell and i dated a few years back; hopefully he's gotten over me at this point. chinese food was created for me. i woo men with my sensuous and godlike trombone playing, i can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and i cook thirty-minute brownies in twenty minutes. i once single-handedly defended a small village in the amazon basin from a horde of ferocious army ants. my friends and i create eco-friendly vehicles on my street. i also enjoy mugging petite soccer players with my amBADASSadors and my highschool team. the laws of physics do not apply to me. i balance, i weave, i dodge, i frolic, and my bills are all paid. on weekends, to let off steam, i participate in full-contact origami. my deft floral arrangements have earned me fame in international botany circles. children trust me. i can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. i guess that's it. |
