I'm confusing and mixed up
No you'll never understand me.
Don't believe me? Find out for yourself.
I don't actually know.
Maybe friends
Maybe enemies
Maybe escapism
Maybe to finally be understood.
I sing. I can do pretty much everything but opera, rap, and things that need a computer.
I write: fanfictions, poetry, short stories, and I'm starting on two novels.
Oh yeah, I'm I guess the teen version of a philosopher, I have my sayings, I have my opinions, and I will let you know them with little hesitation.
the Saw series
the Pirates of the Caribbean series
And any movie involving death and/or torture of the human soul and/or body
CSI
Law&Order
Linkin Park
Breaking Benjamin
Evanescence
Breaking Point
Panic! At the Disco
My Chemical Romance
AFI
H.I.M.
Cradle of Filth
Within Temptation
Chiodos
Aiden
Gackt
Kumi Koda
Ayumi Hamasaki
Utada Hikaru
Simple Plan
Three Days Grace
3 Doors Down
A Day To Remember
Paramore
Papa Roach
Lifehouse
Switchfoot
Bowling for Soup
Green Day
Fall Out Boy
Blue October
Blink 182
Enigma
Pink
Wallflower by Tomoka Hayakawa
DNAngel byYukira Sugisaki
the colors black and scarlet
anime and manga
sharp and pointy things.
weapons of any kind (except bombs-they're no fun)
everyone on my dad's side except my dad
my stepdad (he knows more about me then either my mom or my real dad, and he actually listens and gives good advice.)
beating the shit out of my male family members
training
playing football (watching it is no fun)
writing things that make people change emotions
singing and dancing in the shower
dancing like a complete idiot when no one is looking
and annoying the hell out of people who think I'm a complete idiot by making them look like a complete idiotic, foolish jerkoff.
the colors pink and purple (yuck)
shopping
teachers who judge my learning abilities by what I act like instead of my almost perfect test scores (dumb bitches/bastards)
when people stop me from choking a girl
it when I'm left in the dark about things that could've helped me.
opening up to people
love (it's stupid and pointless and one of the few things I don't understand.)
my mom, my grandma (on my mom's side), and my real dad (Stop judging me all the time and support me once in awhile! Maybe I'd stop staring at a blade like it's my best friend.)
fakes/two-faced people/ and bastards.
that my mom was adopted and I have no real clue who my real grandparents are on her side.
that when I know I'm right she always wants to shut me up and things just get more and more complicated
and a whole lot of other shit involving my family.
|
"Fighting myself in the shadows, I approach myself in disarray. I turn my back on all that is me and run towards what I’ve always been. I lay at your feet like a broken doll, singing a tuneless song. I cry to you for fear of love, and love you for fear of sadness. My insanity will swallow you like the dark tunnel of our souls. I admit I’ll never want the sanity that you all yearn and beg for, I’ll follow my chosen path to the end, dying only the second I begin to live."
By Kitthana
People who know me personally can tell you this from experience, I'm not emotionally stable all the time. I have severe ADHD and ADD and I can go from being happy and hyper to being pissed and annoyed. No I'm not bipolar, but things that should effect people very little are the things that hit me the most and the things that would make people go insane are the things that seem to concern me least. I'm backward, mixed up, and confused. Got it? I need someone who can understand that though I don't want to be controlled I need to. One who can look past the physical and realize that it is still important. Someone whose heart is almost as big as his brain. I want someone whose definition of love is as distorted as mine....someone who can calm the rage in me and turn it into joy. Someone who knows that danger can only love danger and that a toy is sometimes the master...I need a ruler....a lover....a fighter....a soldier....a martyr....I need perfection in it's cruelest form and in it's darkest hours. I'm confusing and mixed up No you'll never understand me. Don't believe me? Find out for yourself. body{ background:#000000; background-image:url('<ahref=http://photobucket.com/images/dark%20heartstarget=_blank><imgsrc=http://i442.photobucket.com/albums/qq148/Cookiecoo369/Dark%20Images/connected.jpgborder=0alt=heartsPictures,ImagesandPhotos/></a>'); background-position:center; background-repeat:repeat; } |
